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In addition to the 5 Decision Making Steps, there are a number of strategies you can use for effective helping. (For action steps in each topic area please go to that specific topic):<\/p>\nIn addition to the 5 Decision Making Steps, there are a number of strategies you can use for effective helping. (For action steps in each topic area please go to that specific topic):<\/p>\n
Emergency situations unfold quickly and often require immediate helping responses.<\/p>\n
Carefully assess the entire situation\/circumstances before making any decisions or taking any action. Choose the most effective ways of helping for that particular situation. Be sure to not make the situation escalate.<\/p>\n
Consider both direct and indirect ways to intervene:<\/p>\n
Non-emergency situations unfold more slowly and allow more careful planning of a helping response.<\/strong><\/p>\n Consider both direct and indirect ways to intervene:<\/strong><\/p>\n Note:<\/em><\/strong>\u00a0If you do not act immediately, don\u2019t ignore the situation. Just because you don\u2019t act right then and there doesn\u2019t mean you can\u2019t do it later!<\/p>\n Whatever response you choose, remember the following:<\/strong><\/p>\n I Care<\/strong> I See<\/strong> I Feel\u00a0<\/strong> I Want<\/strong> I Will<\/strong> Adapted from University of Massachusetts, Amherst Health Services, Virginia Alcohol Safety Action Program, and The BACCHUS Network.<\/em><\/p>\n I Care\u00a0<\/strong> I See<\/strong> I Feel\u00a0<\/strong> I Want<\/strong> I Will<\/strong> Other possible phrases to which to confront a teammate or another person:<\/strong><\/p>\n 3 things TO do:<\/strong><\/p>\n 3 things to NOT do:<\/strong><\/p>\n Don\u2019t deal with content until you deal with emotion.<\/strong><\/p>\n Human behavior is complex and intervention styles will depend on situations and roles. Everyone is a mix of all styles, but most people have tendencies toward one or two styles.\u00a0The goal is to increase understanding of your style, others\u2019 style, and how to interact for the best intervention.<\/em><\/p>\n Adapted from the work of Jeff Janssen and the DiSC\u00a9 Behavioral Assessment.<\/em><\/p>\n NOTE: All styles can be an Owl by best using their strengths and responding appropriately and effectively to the situation.<\/strong><\/p>\n As a bystander, one way to Step UP! is to get those involved in a situation to think about how current actions lead to future consequences. Remind them that what feels beneficial at the time may have greater long-term costs. In other words, are the \u201crewards\u201d of the moment more valuable than the potential costs of the future (e.g., loss of scholarship; suspension\/expulsion; criminal record, etc.)? Also, consider how long the \u201crewards\u201d last vs. how long the \u201ccosts\u201d last. How long will your choice impact your life a day\/week\/month or year later? Considering possible costs and rewards over time can be eye-opening.<\/p>\n Help others by getting them to stop and think about what they are doing \u2014 or about to do. Is their decision aligned with their stated values? Will it jeopardize their future? Their goals? Their reputation? What they\u2019ve worked so hard for? What you\u2019ve ALL worked so hard for? Losing a teammate, even for a short period of time, may cost them (and you) in more ways than one. While it is important to support your teammates, it isn\u2019t always easy to know how to best do this. Blindly following actions and\/or not intervening in a situation you know in your gut to be wrong, is NOT supporting a teammate but rather assisting in their future troubles.<\/p>\n Please see the\u00a0Scenario Worksheet<\/a>\u00a0in Appendix B for an example.<\/em><\/p>\n\n
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The 5-Point Formula\/Script<\/h2>\nThe 5-Point Formula<\/h3>\n
\nLet the person know you care about him\/her and that because of the significance of the relationship you need to discuss something very important. Both start and end the discussion with an emphasis that you are doing this out of genuine concern, caring, and respect for the person, sandwiching the difficult feedback between strong positives. Choose words you are comfortable with and fit your style.<\/p>\n
\nReport\/Review actual events with your friend, as you perceive them. Remember you are evaluating the behavior, not the person. Try to limit your statements to observable, irrefutable facts. The more you have, the better.<\/p>\n
\nTell the person your own feelings using \u201cI statements\u201d to reveal your feelings.<\/p>\n
\nTell the person what you would like to see happen.<\/p>\n
\nSpecify what you will or will not do. Only set ultimatums if you can, and will, stick to them.<\/p>\nScript<\/h3>\n
\n\u201cJohn, do you have a minute? Because you\u2019re such a good friend and I really care about you, I want to talk to you about something very important.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\u201cI\u2019ve been noticing that you are not going to class as much and your practices haven\u2019t been as productive lately. From my perspective, you really don\u2019t seem to be yourself. I\u2019ve seen you drinking more when we go out and it seems to be more frequent than in the past. You even got into that fight last weekend at the party and I\u2019ve never seen that from you before.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\u201cI\u2019m worried about how it is affecting you \u2014 personally, in school, and on the team. To be honest I\u2019m also scared about what could happen to you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\u201cJohn, I want what\u2019s best for you and the team. I\u2019d like to see you get some help \u2013 and sooner rather than later \u2014 at least talk to someone \u2014 either Coach Jones or even someone at our Counseling Center. You have so much to offer and the team really needs you! I\u2019d really hate for something bad to happen because of a poor decision.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\u201cI\u2019d be willing to go with you if you want. I want to support you however I can because I respect you and you are very important to me \u2014 and to the team \u2014 but I will not lie for you and I will not watch you continue to make unhealthy choices. I\u2019m really concerned John.\u201d<\/p>\n\n
Within Your Team<\/h2>\n
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When Dealing with High Emotion<\/h2>\n
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How to Increase Helping<\/h2>\n
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\nspiral of silence, etc.)<\/li>\n5 Intervention Styles<\/h2>\n
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Shark (D)<\/h3>\n
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Fox (I)<\/h3>\n
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Teddy Bear (S)<\/h3>\n
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Turtle (C)<\/h3>\n
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Owl<\/h3>\n
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Making Value-Based Decisions<\/h2>\n
The 5 Core Questions<\/h2>\n